"Let your heart
feel for the afflictions and distress of everyone."
-George Washington
Beware, however, of
the paralysis that may follow.
Last week, I found
out that one of the patients I had cared for while she was admitted to the
hospital died within a couple of weeks of going home.
I suppose, depending
on the expectations and theories one associates with being hospitalized, this
could come as an expected eventual outcome. While I'm not feeling particularly
profound or philosophical, I suppose it's worth conceding that the eventual outcome
is always death. Except this sweet, unfortunate, confused lady was not here for
any acute health issues, but rather, a worsening of many chronic ones. And her
true cause of admission? A complex constellation of social symptoms. Her
"eventual" death came too soon.
Her true illness was
joblessness, near homelessness. No health insurance. No resources. Limited
supports. A language barrier. A profound degree of not just health illiteracy,
but illiteracy, period. The overwhelming combination eventually brought her path
to intersect mine for a brief interlude. In theory, I cared for her and made
her feel better. But I had no remedies, none at all, for the true causes of her
multiple diseases. My prescription pad was useless in more ways than one -- not
only could I not write her for a home, or a paycheck, or a family, but the few
medications I could write her for, she
would be unable to take due to lack of comprehension.
We try, with
incredible efforts from our social workers and case managers, to set up safe
discharge plans for our patients, but in so many ways, our hands are tied. She
left our hospital bed and returned to her familiar ground. Within a few short
weeks, she died -- ostensibly of medical causes, but actually of so many social
ones. And since then, I've wondered what more I could have done to prevent
this, and what more I can do for the next incarnation of her confluence of
social issues who crosses my path. I've yet to come up with any answers, and am
left feeling miserably inadequate.
This is not meant as
a social commentary, though the situation deserves one. I have no
groundbreaking insight or ideas on how to remedy this story and the multitudes
like it, at least not just yet.
This is an
outpouring of grief and regret. Of failure.
I'm sorry.
